Reverse Engineer Unisex T-shirt

Some people say "Science can amuse and fascinate us all, but it is engineering that changes the world". Well, with this shirt you can literally do both. Prepare to amuse and fascinate folks as they look at your shirt and mutter something like "That must have been a printing error" - NO SHARON, THERE IS NO PRINTING ERROR HERE; I'M JUST REVERSE ENGINEERING YOUR CONCEPT OF CLOTHING. Who needs a shirt to be readable at a glance? People who aren't looking for solutions, that's who. You're wearing a %100 cotton shirt that can, with a little ingenuity be reduced to a handful of cotton balls in an emergency scenario. You're a problem-maker-solver. In that order.